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How can I cope better with the pain of regret?

December 7, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Answer: Watch this brilliant TED video where  Kathryn Schulz discusses the psychology of regret and suggests ways to deal with it.

http://www.ted.com We’re taught to try to live life without regret. But why? Using her own tattoo as an example, Kathryn Schulz makes a powerful and moving case for embracing our regrets.

“If we have goals and dreams and we want to do our best, and if we love people and we don’t want to hurt them or lose them, we should feel pain when things go wrong. The point isn’t to live without any regrets, the point is to not hate ourselves for having them… We need to learn to love the flawed, imperfect things that we create, and to forgive ourselves for creating them. Regret doesn’t remind us that we did badly — it reminds us that we know we can do better.” Kathryn Schultz

Filed Under: coping with regret, emotional, negative emotions Tagged With: , ,

How can I inspire myself again when I’m feeling discouraged?

October 26, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Answer: Watch videos of passionate, inspiring people and see if you can “catch” some of their passion and impressiveness.

This strategy is called “hanging around good company” or “positive priming” and  is such a pleasant way to get re-vitalized.  Watching admirable and passionate human beings is so good for the soul!

Today I “discovered” and felt beautifully uplifted by Robert Fischell. What an amazing guy!  He is a successful medical-device inventor. He won the TED prize for 2005. Here he is giving his acceptance talk, where he describes three of his medical inventions and presents his three wishes:

And it looks like Robert Fischell’s migraine “zapper” does work  for some migraine people:

Lancet Neurol. 2010 Apr;9(4):373-80. Epub 2010 Mar 4.

Single-pulse transcranial magnetic stimulation for acute treatment of migraine with aura: a randomised, double-blind, parallel-group, sham-controlled trial.

Abstract

BACKGROUND:

Preliminary work suggests that single-pulse transcranial magnetic stimulation (sTMS) could be effective as a treatment for migraine. We aimed to assess the efficacy and safety of a new portable sTMS device for acute treatment of migraine with aura.

METHODS:

We undertook a randomised, double-blind, parallel-group, two-phase, sham-controlled study at 18 centres in the USA. 267 adults aged 18-68 years were enrolled into phase one. All individuals had to meet international criteria for migraine with aura, with visual aura preceding at least 30% of migraines followed by moderate or severe headache in more than 90% of those attacks. 66 patients dropped out during phase one. In phase two, 201 individuals were randomly allocated by computer to either sham stimulation (n=99) or sTMS (n=102). We instructed participants to treat up to three attacks over 3 months while experiencing aura. The primary outcome was pain-free response 2 h after the first attack, and co-primary outcomes were non-inferiority at 2 h for nausea, photophobia, and phonophobia. Analyses were modified intention to treat and per protocol. This trial is registered with ClinicalTrials.gov, number NCT00449540.

FINDINGS:

37 patients did not treat a migraine attack and were excluded from outcome analyses. 164 patients treated at least one attack with sTMS (n=82) or sham stimulation (n=82; modified intention-to-treat analysis set). Pain-free response rates after 2 h were significantly higher with sTMS (32/82 [39%]) than with sham stimulation (18/82 [22%]), for a therapeutic gain of 17% (95% CI 3-31%; p=0.0179). Sustained pain-free response rates significantly favoured sTMS at 24 h and 48 h post-treatment. Non-inferiority was shown for nausea, photophobia, and phonophobia. No device-related serious adverse events were recorded, and incidence and severity of adverse events were similar between sTMS and sham groups.

INTERPRETATION:

Early treatment of migraine with aura by sTMS resulted in increased freedom from pain at 2 h compared with sham stimulation, and absence of pain was sustained 24 h and 48 h after treatment. sTMS could be a promising acute treatment for some patients with migraine with aura.

What is TED?

TED is a wonderful source of videos of passionate, inspiring human beings. If you haven’t discovered TED already, do yourself a big favor and go check out their site:

TED. Ideas Worth Spreading. Riveting talks by remarkable people, free to the world


Filed Under: emotional, negative emotions, overcoming discouragement Tagged With: , , ,

How can I control my anger better?

October 1, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Answer: When you feel your anger building up, tighten all your muscles; then let go all at once.

This  quick muscle-relaxation technique is mentioned in Daniel Goleman’s book Working with Emotional Intelligence (p 273).

Try it now. Pretend you are starting to feel angry about something. Tighten all your muscles as hard as you can.  Hold. Then let go. No more anger!

Practice this a couple of times a day for the next few days so you’ll remember what to do next time you get angry.

Filed Under: emotional, handling anger, negative emotions Tagged With: , ,

How can I cope better with the loss of a loved one?

August 24, 2011 by Leave a Comment

Answer: This online e-couch Bereavement and Loss program might help.


The program is free, but you do need to register. Click here to go to the new user page.

Here’s a description of the program from their website:


Welcome to the e-couch Bereavement & Loss program

The first part of the program is the e-couch Bereavement & Loss Information section.

Here you’ll find information about grief and loss, including what is actually happening when we experience grief, common emotional reactions to loss, and unhelpful myths and expectations about grief.

Go to the Bereavement & Loss Information Section.

The second part of the program involves ideas and self-help tools which may help with grief

A lightbulbAlthough it’s not possible to turn back the clock or remove the fact of a loss, you may find some of these ideas are useful for helping with your grief.

Go to Ideas to help with Grief
This will take you to the Bereavement & Loss self-help page.

Workbook

Your workbook is an important part of your program

Your workbook contains interactive exercises and diaries, and will become available as you progress through e-couch.

Go to my workbook

Other e-couch programs

Filed Under: coping with bereavement, emotional, negative emotions Tagged With: ,