PERMA for remembering the five components of well-being

P = positive affect ( feeling happy)

E = engagement, flow, absorption in whatever you’re doing

R = relationships, positive ones

M = meaning in your life

A = accomplishment, pursuing success and mastery just because it’s satisfying

(from Flourish by Martin Seligman, p 16)

How to use PERMA?

  1. Add PERMA to your daily checklist of things to do and review. At the end of the day, think about how good the day was in terms of your sense of happiness, engagement, positive social experiences, meaning and accomplishment.
  2. Use PERMA to help you prioritize your activities. We can’t do everything we want to do, but we can choose to do the important things.

STAR for thinking before acting and reveiwing after acting

S = Stop
T = Think
A = Act
R = Review

STAR is a handy acronym that reminds us to use that space that sits between the stimulus coming in and our response going out: R.

STAR wants us to make that space bigger than we usually do and also to spend some time thinking about how our action turned out.

STAR wants us to:

  • “do consequences”
  • “engage the brain before putting our mouth into gear”
  • “look before we leap”
  • “measure twice, cut once”

STAR tells us that “an impulsive me is an ineffective me”.

Here are some wise words from The Inner Brat Newsletter

“Engage brain before putting mouth into gear.”

I couldn’t find the origin of this saying, but it ranks in my top ten instructions for successful living. It’s just another way of saying, “Think before you speak,” but it sounds much more important.

When your mouth gets moving before your brain is engaged, your inner brat is unfettered. There is no filter to prevent you from saying things you might later regret.

Here are some risks of speaking without thinking:

• You might hurt/alarm/offend others, intentionally or not

• You might regret betraying secrets and confidences

• You might lose the advantage while negotiating

• You might lose respect from others

• Your reputation might suffer long-term damage

• You might lose your chance for a date, for a job or for a promotion

• You might get into trouble with the law

• You can’t take back what you said